Mika - 'Big Girl (You Are Beautiful)'
I'm not sure I can remember the last time a song offended me on this many levels. Before writing this review, I had to Google the lyrics just to make sure that I wasn't mishearing them, that they definitely were as offensive as I thought. Turns out, not only had I not misheard them, but I'd actually missed a few of the worse examples so I ended up even more offended than I anticipated.
It takes a particular kind of skill to write a song that somehow offends fat people AND thin people at the same time (I'll leave it to you to guess which category I fall under), while at the same time being objectively offensive on a creative level because the melody is exactly the same as your last single. My brain is offended, Mika, that you didn't think I'd spot that, or perhaps just assumed that it wouldn't bother me. BUT THAT WAS YOUR BIG MISTAKE, MIKA, IF THAT IS IN FACT YOUR REAL NAME. (Wikipedia confirms it is, or thereabouts. Just checking.)
So, the central conceit of this song, in case you're having trouble keeping up, is that big girls are beautiful. And in these days of size zero and the terrifying concept that is "thinspiration", obviously that's a very laudable and positive message. Except, apparently, big girls all feel hugely ashamed of themselves and spend all day thinking about what total heifers they are (we can't help thinking Beth Ditto would have a counter-argument of some sorts to go with this, somehow) - until Mika comes along and reminds them that they are beautiful to HIM. Because it all comes back to Mika, remember?
Since his first hit was little more than one of those annoying customer satisfaction surveys ("why don't you like me? Why don't you like me? Why don't you walk out the door? Please choose from the following options. Tick 10 for strongly agree, five for neither agree nor disagree, one for strongly disagree.") and largely a tiresome piece of navel-gazing about all the other famous people he thinks he's as good as, and his second hit reminded us that whether we're enjoying the day we're having or not, the most important thing by far is that WE ALL LOVE MIKA, I'm sort of sensing a theme here. I still can't quite work out if this is the work of a raging egomaniac or the world's most insecure person. It's the same feeling I get whenever I read a news story about Robbie Williams.
The verse lyrics are frankly bizarre ("walks into the room/feels like a big balloon...Diet Coke and a pizza please/Diet Coke and I'm on my knees"), to the extent where I spent most of the song cringing out of sheer embarrassment for him. And there doesn't appear to be a second verse, he just repeats the first one again - presumably so you can make sure you weren't going crazy, and you really did hear what you thought you heard the first time. Then the chorus kicks in, which is 'Love Today' redux to the point where you'll find yourself singing the wrong lyrics over it, and musically, the whole thing's a bloody shambles.
And then there's The Message. Like I said, the sentiment's fine but it's so clumsily and narcissistically delivered as to be - and here's that word again, for those of you keeping score - offensive (it puts me in mind of Little Britain's Marjorie Dawes, being all "you're all attractive in your own way aren't you, fatties?").
Oh, and I mentioned it was offensive to thin people too - perhaps less egregiously so, but the sentiment that only someone who's the equivalent of four regular women (because BIG GIRLS all have BIG PERSONALITIES and an INSATIABLE HUNGER FOR LIFE, according to my Oxford Compendium of Weight-Based Stereotypes) is enough to satisfy Mika is kind of gross.
Thin people have feelings too, y'know. The entire thing is so ridiculous that I just cannot take this song seriously at all, and the sad thing is that I think Mika does, at least partially. It makes 'Baby Got Back' look like a Judith Butler essay on gender politics, and there's a sentence I truly never expected to write.
Download: Out now
CD Released: July 16th
(Steve Perkins)
Comments
Yeah... I'm skinny! All we need now is someone to do a single about skinny girls!
Just because someone spells out his praise for big girls doesn't mean others should start singing about skinny girls specifically. Most (not to say all) songs featuring girls are written with skinny girls in mind, so if you want a song about skinny girls go on MTV. Why do you think anorexia is the latest fashion?
Oh, and I think it's a good idea to cut it out about Mika being 'narcissistic' and 'self-loving', that is so not funny (and not true either). Just let him write and sing his music in peace. If you don't like it, listen to something else.
[Er...that narcissism thing? It's really not a joke. Have you HEARD the lyrics to the last two Mika hits? - Fraser]
Hmm something tells me Mika got it a bit wrong with this song :-S It's still stuck in my head anyway.
I totally agree with this. The song is a mess! Maybe hes simple...
Fool
Yes, I've heard the lyrics to his other two singles, as well as other album songs, and they strongly indicate narcissism, I agree. Though when you read interviews with him he's not really full of himself as the songs imply. His songs aren't all autobiographical (have you heard Billy Brown?)
Anyway, keep up the great blog, I like to read it even though Mika generally gets poor reviews :)
[I don't really know why Billy Brown wasn't the next single. Or Lollipop, which would have been an amazing pop moment, seeing as it's total musical Marmite. Thanks for the support, Bianca, you rule! - Fraser]
Mika is amazing
his performance at oxegen was one of my highlights
though i do think someone should write a song saying, hey its ok to be skinny too
Frankly, it's about time all these skinny gits took their size zero whinges back to whatever branch of Idiots R Us they come from. It's also safe to say that Beth Ditto is a seriously troubled woman who will spend most of the thruppence ha'penny she earns from honking like a stranded seal on intensive therapy. And much as I love 'Baby Got Back', even I can't defend it. Although Sir Mix A Lot does put up a tremendous case against plastic surgery in the second verse;
"I like 'em round, and big
And when I'm throwin' a gig
I just can't help myself, I'm actin' like an animal
Now here's my scandal
I wanna get you home
And ugh, double-up, ugh, ugh
I ain't talkin' bout Playboy
'Cause silicone parts are made for toys
I want 'em real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Mix-a-Lot's in trouble"
Poetry.
Ok let's be accurate people: this is Mika's 4th single, not the third. Before 'Grace Kelly' (2nd single) and 'Love Today' (3rd single), there was 'Relax (Take it Easy)', that was the first single people. Just because no one bought it in Stupid Britain doesn't mean you can't mention it. Here in France 'Relax' was a HUUUUGE hit, as it deserved to be.
[Good point, Sev. I've corrected the review now. Probably not as much as you'd like, seeing as it's still a no-star review, but details are important! - Fraser]
"Skinny gits" ??????
You wouldn't be fat, by any chance, S Hamilton?!?!
Thought so.
To be fair, 'Baby Got Back' is a more accurate representation of what a healthy female form should resemble, in terms of 'when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a big butt' etc. insofar as women are meant to be curvy in the sense of actual bulge-pinch ratio, rather than 'AAH, TEH ROLLZ' or 'wtf is this a twelve-year-old boy or a thirty year old woman' and so... err, I can't remember what I was attempting to say here, escept that obviously in terms of feminist discourse, Sir Mixalot > Mika.
thank you for displaying my point of view so well! mika is indeed a fool.
Sev wrote: "Skinny gits" ?????? You wouldn't be fat, by any chance, S Hamilton?!?! Thought so.
And you I would assume, are a close relation of Calista Flockhart.
awww :S i love this song! i suppose you're right on some levels but i think it's cute. mika reminds me of a little brother who keeps pogo-ing around.
"Total musical Marmite"... must remember not to drink while reading Chart Blog, just spat out my water. That was priceless Fraser, you made my birthday! I agree that Lollipop would have made a great single. Thanks for the compliment, Chart Blog rules!
[Aw. Happy Birthday Bianca! Sorry I've messed your desk up there... - Fraser]
Awesomely harsh stars.. can't say I disagree with that at all though. Not a big Mika fan to start with, I find him as tiring as a hyperactive toddler, but this song is a totally new low.
You're right, the melody does sound way too similar which is totally boring because I couldn't be bothered with it the first time round and not much has changed since. Besides that, I love the people who tackle some sort of discrimination by declaring their full and undying support for the underdogs and ONLY them.. that's just reversing the discrimination, not removing it.
am i the only onje in this bloody world that likes this song. Your image of beautiful is stick thin.
Jess, just because someone doesn't like this annoying, insulting and repititive song doesn't mean their idea of beauty is a skeleton!
I think big girls would find this insulting as well! I mean, 'diest coke and a pizza please'? Mika, you do know that some girls are just naturally big, they don't shove their face every day! He really, really needs to release Lollipop.
i think he has blown it with this song
"Frankly, it's about time all these skinny gits took their size zero whinges back to whatever branch of Idiots R Us they come from."
What the...?!
Some people, like myself, are naturally skinny because they have random (natural) hormone levels which keeps their weight down. Just because we're not size 12+ when that is seemingly what's becoming fashionable, doesn't mean you can refer to all of us as 'skinny gits'. Very few of us are anorexic, whatever you might think.
I have loads of friends who are a lot bigger then me, I honestly don't care what size someone is...until some fat oaf who's sitting alone feeling sorry for his/herself lumps every thin person together because they've developed a grudge against everyone who isn't size 100.
If you don't like being big, push away from the table.
Anyway. Before I begin offending anyone other then 'S Hamilton', I don't particularly like this song. I don't particularly like any of Mika's songs, come to that. He sounds like a BeeJee on repeat, sometimes alernating lyrics...xD
some interesting points have been made but at the end of the day, the songs just plain bad
never got the whole idea of it being uber-offensive until i listened to it today . . .
i actually couldnt stop laughing!!
and this songs supposed to make "big girls" feel better . . . by calling them balloons and four times the size of a normal person
wow mika really knows how to charm a girl . . .
I think your taking the lyrics a tad too seriously.
Like the 'umberella' song from Rihana.
It doesn't mean when ever she sings it starts raining. (much)
Mika in my eyes is a fantastic singer/ singwriter. And i loved this song as they are all up beat and not doom and gloom, which is what we want for summer!
Hi,
Interesting read.
Being a large woman myself, I do not take offence to Mika´s song - on the contrary. I think it´s quite refreshing and upbeat.
True, he could have written a second verse - not just repeated the first - it´s not as if he´s not got enough creative grey matter. He could have done a whole lot more with the song.
Mika wrote the song with "The Butterfly Lounge" on the outskirts of Los Angeles, in mind. It´s the first size acceptance nightclub in the world, so kudos to him for doing that.
He says something to the effect of "take your skinny girl and multiply her by four". He does not say take your normal sized person and multiply her by four. So no, as a big girl, I do not take offence to the lyrics.
He could have written a song about how beauty can be perceived in any size; how beauty really comes from within, but he chose to write this one.
Remember, Mika is a singer/songwriter and as such, does as most of his occupation do, which is state his personal opinions regarding different things. It´s not narcissistic to do this - it can be viewed as part and parcel of the job.
Indeed, most individual creative processes involve expressing one´s own viewpoint. Take your piece of writing for this blog, for example. I would be the last to call you self-centred for letting us know what you think.
Incidentally, if Mika were really as discriminating as some of you believe, he would not have a thin drum player, nor would he tour with all the different sized people that he does.
"He dicho", as they would say in my country.
T.x
S Hamilton wrote:
And you I would assume, are a close relation of Calista Flockhart.
No, actually, S Hamilton,you assume wrong. I am a perfectly normal size 8-10. Ok in Britain you probably think that's skinny (!), but here in France it's perfectly normal. So please have the courtesy of not insulting every person who isn't a size +.
what do you mean?? I don't know if I'm missing something here but I have read your comments on his song 'big girl (you are beautiful)' twice and still can't understand what you mean!! It doesn't offend anyone, it is simply saying that bigger girls are beautiful too, and he sings this in a melodic and tuneful style (which by the way is not using the same melody as the last single!!) Is it that difficult to appreciate that just because you don't like something doesn't mean that other people can't either.
Sorry Fraser M. But I don't agree with you- Keep going with your great songs Mika.
I like the song, but it is a bit wierd. Ok, it does tell people it is ok to be big, but somethings in it are offensive to bigger people.
hey!
its a bloody good song this - has to be number 1!!
coz its better than umbrella
This song may be kinda crappy but I absolutely love the interaction between the hookline and that Cowbell (or drumming on a glass?) sound that plays every second bar on the third offbeat and on the four.
this song is rather offensive. It's basically saying 'you could be large, you could be ugly, you could look like a man....but yes ladies, you could still get off with THE mika!' OH WOW! NOT! Grrrr. Actually no, his other songs have generally been okay. Sure, he does sing about himself alot....but who cares? So do lots of other celebs *cough justin trousersnake cough* and he does sing really well live...he sounded quite amazing at Glastonbury so maybe he's not all bad. BTW Fraser...you actually rock! BYEE!
[No YOU rock! This could go on a while.. - Fraser]
No...YOU ROCK! Haha...this is fun....
I generally like Mika but as a "big girl" myself this song does nothing but make me cringe. Im sure that he thinks hes being very PC and positive and make plus size girls feel good, but in fact it does just the opposite.
Its just what we need, not only do we have to put up with idiots feling like they can make coments on our size, they now have a ready made song to use as weapons! GREAT!
Oh, and I dont need Mika to qualify how I feel as a woman with curves... I liked his other stuff but hes totally off the mark with this one,sorry Mika!
i am a size 20 and am proud to be i in no way find this offensive just really funny! the same as queen fat bottomed girls i do not spend all day feeling ashamed of myself quite the opposite really i am proud of who i am and to me this is just another mika song i can sing and murder down the kareoke bar!
usually i agree with u but i have to say you're all wrong on this 1
mika rocks - i loved his dedicating 'big girl' to the "ditto"at oxegen this year and this song is just his way of saying its ok to be fat (if a little unhealthy) - just like beth ditto does (by stripping for nme)
i prefer mika's way to be honest
I think this review is hilarious i like the song but
i did think it was affensive to big and thin people
what a blunder!
Not all big people want to be refered 2 as
balloons and whats all that 'skinny girl and feel
like im gonna die' about
made me laugh so much
Oh come on please... stop being so sentimental about this. I'm not a Mika fan so i'm looking at this objectively & i think we can take things a bit less seriously for once. It's just a funny, light-hearted, happy song with surely no intention of hurting anyone. I don't expect it to cause a revolution against skinny people or to demean big people it just expresses one person's opinions that's it. I think that those of you who are obsessing with the lyrics &find them demeaning are just bored and have nothing better to do. Relax, take it easy..as Mika would say.
Listen to Heart Of Hearts by !!! and you will see Mika tried to make a track like it but failed miserably.
seriously one of the effing funniest reiews ive eva read. strange comparison to baby got back. like u sed definatly one you wouldnt expect. and i see now wat u mean about the simalar melody to love today. but this is worse and 10 times more patronizing. your right there is an ongoing theme with his music. 'LOVE LOVE ME, LOVE LOVE ME, LOVE LOVE..... Y DONT YOU LIKE ME????' ARRRHHHHH OVERKILL!!!!! if he wants love that bad then maybe he shud try an oline dating agency. and im sure one of his curvy doting fans wudnt mind a rumble. and after seeing the video for love today, ive become sure hes trying to hypnotize the nation into loving him with all the swirly lights.
I think he's just taking the p*** out of big laaydeeeees!
Multiply her by FOUR!!!!!!
Cheeky b*!
chill out germaine greer
Has I can see from other peoples point-of-views, this song is took in many different ways. I do and I do not take it offensive, being big myself. "Feels like a big Balloon", I do however take that offensive and the way he says take your Skinny girl and multiply her by 4. However, a Skinny girl is seen has size 6-10. Therefore, 4 multiply by 10 is 40. Big girls aren't that big, so I see that piece of lyric has a total lie.
It's true, people see beautiful has being skinny but this song does proove that big girls can be beautiful too.
Me and a friend noticed that in the Video it contains all sorts of different sized girl but is talking about big girls only. I don't get Mika at times.
I do actually like this song, it's a cheerful and energetic song but the lyrics suck. I am a fan of Mika but maybe he could of done a little bit better this time.
lol!!! interesting view point... but i kinda like mika.. & if he claims that he likes big girls... gud for him,,
big deal!!! does it really matter what a person hs written & why he hs written it? he is just making a point.. the song is good, enjoy it.. if not, then u hv several othr options..
i love mika and love this song. with all the arguments over size zero its about time someone noticed theres more to this world and more to looking skinny. hes just giving encouragment to the people who need it. im size 16 and i dont find this song offensive in the slightest.
Thank goodness! Finally someone smart enough to understand the implications of these lyrics!
The worst parts about this song are all the skinny girls that think this song is uplifting and all the big girls that think it's supposed to make them feel good about their weight.
hello? did i read correct? you think mika is being offencive? you need your brain checked. hs stikin up 4 larger gals so go and suck a lemon
I'm fat and I don't feel offended. Yes, the lyrics are weak and somewhat silly, so what? It's not supposed to be literature, it's a light-hearted pop song. Besides, I don't understand it as meaning that big girls necessarily feel bad about themselves, but that social representations and in a general way everything around them keeps telling them that they *should* feel bad - which is true. When you're surrounded and harrassed without interruption by one single stardard of beauty, it's sometimes difficult to resist to it and you have to feel "like a big baloon" once in a while, even with a rock-solid good opinion of yourself. I don't feel that this song is being condescending to fatties either. So many songs describe the ideal woman like a fragile waif, what's wrong with taking it the other way around for once? What's so offensive about saying "I prefer fat chicks"?
And all you skinny girls - come on, give me a break, you're celebrated to no end all day long, believe me I'm not being insensitive if I really don't think your self-esteem is in any danger because if this song.
PS: Eve, how is ordering a pizza "shoving your face"? If you saw a thin girl eating a pizza you wouldn't think she's "shoving her face", right? It's not an everyday food but it's a perfectly normal meal, just like a piece of cake is a perfectly normal one-in-a-while dessert. I'm fat but I eat normally. I eat pizza one in a while. And cake. And chocolate. And no, I'm not "shoving my face". Actually, 10 years of dieting attempts made me fat, not pizza or chocolate.
It's a brilliant song. I'm neither a big girl nor a skinny girl, you could say I'm Stuck In The Middle (not actually much fun either), but it's just a song and I can't see why anyone would find it offensive. If you don't like it, don't listen.
It is a beautiful song. I am a big girl.
Being a larger lady myself I quite like this!
And anyway its not the first time a song about the larger lady has ever been released. The rock gods that were Queen released Fat Bottomed Girls way back in the late seventies, and just recently Jarvis Cocker had a song called Big Julie on his first solo album.
Not sure about the 'big balloon' bit tho, last time I checked I felt like human and not latex!