Paper Monitor
10:04 UK time, Tuesday, 30 December 2008
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
The dust has settled and the aftermath of the Christmas aftermath is now apparent.
The Daily Mirror reveals that Nigella Lawson has caused a jump in semolina sales after including the ingredient in a Christmas recipe. The Mirror, not one to blow its own trumpet, waits all the way until the end of paragraph one before revealing that this recipe was in the Mirror.
On the front of the Daily Express they're sensitively handling a public health story with the screamer headline: "KILLER FLU HITS BRITAIN". It's not like they've taken this tack before, is it?
Further inside the paper there's a reader offer for all those people who just can't get the smell of rancid turkey off their hands - a "stainless steel soap". Paper Monitor hates to admit its ignorance but it was unaware that rubbing your hands under cold water against such a bar would remove the odour of garlic, fish, or anything else. Like wow.
Sadly washes this offer under cold water. "The shape of a soap bar is purely decorative and any piece of stainless steel, such as a spoon, can be used for the same purpose." So no need to actually spend £12.95 in these straitened times.
And it being the Christmas aftermath, it's prediction time for at least the next week. One is based on the Environment Agency's rather serious sounding report on future water shortages in the UK.
There's only one way to illustrate this for the Daily Mail - "LESS WATER THAN EGYPT". Just in case you haven't got that, there's an atmospheric picture of the Great Pyramid at Giza with a chap on a camel and some desert.
The post-Christmas aftermath is also a time when people think about dieting. Many have mixed feelings, and the Mail illustrates this delightfully.
Page 15 lead - "HAPPINESS IS HAVING A SIZE 14 FIGURE - POLL BOOST FOR THE CURVIER GIRL". Page 16 blurb - "THINK YOUR WAY TO A FLAT TUMMY - DAY TWO OF OUR NEW YEAR DIET PLAN".
So that's settled then.
The 
