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"Stop hounding me!" he cried

The cane scrutiny

He's barking mad I tell you

High up on the woof tops

Derek the fox terrier just wished he hadn't tried to get through that
narrow pipe

ISO foxy ladies

Rover was the canine equivalent of Victoria Beckham

And I suppose you think I'm being sniffy about it

Heaven scent

Who let the dogs flout

Rover knew he had to be quiet - he'd already been throttled enough by his cruel owner

Walkies, indeed

After the ban on fox-hunting, Lord Salopshire had turned his entire pack into walking-sticks

Every dog had his day, some spent it foolishly..

By crossing a foxhound with a giraffe, it meant hunting in long grass just got a lot easier.

You should see what I did to the memsahib when she wouldn't stop moaning

Well heeled

One does not sit up and beg

Oi Peter, I can see your dog house from up here.

It had taken a lot of strength to pull Snuffy out of the hole, but he'd been dragged out eventually

He's just done a long stretch

A dog's wooden tale..

Tally ho on the hors d'oevres, sir

His Lordship's taxidermist was brilliant at heads, but not so good at the rest of the body

Pepperami introduce their new hot dog flavour

He wanted to be a sausage dog

It's a long story

Walkies-stick

Tally ho on the hors d'oeuvres, Sir
(correction)

Walkies stick

His Lordship was a real stick-in-the-mutt

Michael caine had let himself go.

The rest of the pack is in the brolly stand

He was a police dog, special branch

His Lordship decided to keep Rover's memory alive after he was run over by a steam-roller

You should see the matching polo mallet

Leading the witness are we?

After ten years as a sniffer dog, the drugs had had a disastrous effect on poor Sniffy's body

And I suppose you'll want to blow your own trumpet again

The notorious terrier-headed snake of Nepal could lie stiff and immobile for hours before inflicting a terrible death on its unfortunate victim

Rover had his bark removed

Glossed and hound

Well, that would be the last time Rover ever used Comic Sans when writing to his cousin in Borneo!

Lord Membury got all his clothes from Savile Row, and his accessories from Battersea

No barking zone

Just taking the dog? for a walk.

After his death, Rex's owner had reunited him with his favourite tree

His master's (Rolls-)Royce

You should see the other end !!

Like putting a prepared snail back into a shell, Lord Delamare liked to know the source of his salami

Rovers owner was a dog handler

What do you think of the stick? Ruff!

Just remember to say fleas and thank-you

It was suggested the accused had taken part in urban terrierism

Fetch me another drink

Come on Darwin, you must have thought of a name for the ship by now

And later we're playing scratch and sniff

Don't bite the hand that feeds you.

His figure now sadly wasting away, Rover still liked to go to Cruft's as a spectator

I say, I hope there's food. My stomach's growling.

After too many revolutions on the record deck, Nipper was now suffering from the early signs of dementia

I told you this cloning was out of hand

Flann O'Brien noticed that the dog and the stick he so much loved chasing were now becoming as one

Never to be found on the catwalk

Frank really wanted a stick insect, his wife really wanted a dog and so they compromised.

Rovers owner didn't know whether to call a vet or a tree surgeon.

Reynard cackled manically at the sweet revenge he had wrought.

Not all of Harry Potter's shapeshifting spells had the desired outcome

At Cruft's all the dogs wanted to be a size zero

Man, that's some good acid...

Breeding heart

A hound in the hand is worth two in the flush

Harry lamented his poor typing skills. The want ad was for "Fellow Canines" not to be a "Fellows Cain"

If you think this is funny you should see where the rubber end goes

Wherever you hunt, you just can't get the staff these days.

Once bitten, nice try

Urbane fox.

The breeding out of various characteristics had gone too far

My other cane's an Irish Red Sceptre.

Harry lamented his poor typing skills. The want ad was for "Fellow Canines" not to be a "Fellows Cane" (correction)

It's no use throwing it - he just brings it back.

It’s Conrad Black on the line. He wants his stick back, he’s walking.

Disney's foray into the periscope market was not proving successful....

As his eyesight was failing and walking was becoming difficult, this was the perfect solution

Good will hunting

No bad(ly dressed) dogs

Sir William always gave onlookers a pointer on style.

Harry Potter looked down and suddenly realised the Master of the Fox Hounds must have picked up his wand by mistake

"Go right, GO RIGHT! Noooo, not forward, RIGHT! He's THAT WAY I can smell him you fool". Fido never did grasp the idea of retirement.

It is very nice, but you can only buy them in packs of 35.

Man - to new Wife - " When I say no, I mean no"

Scotland Yard denies cost-saving measures will affect tracker dogs and batons.

Yes, Fido was rather fond of walks.....

Here Vicar - will go nicely with your dog collar

"And it's carved from the finest bark."

I think there's been a mistake, I didn't want "Rex" on a stick.....

The howl and wear of it all

"I shouted 'Fetch', he slipped, and the rest, as they say, is history.."

Lord Clacket attended the Peterborough Festival of Hunting every year with dog-head determination

See, you can teach an old dog new sticks.