Sketchup
A selection of lines from parliamentary sketch-writers.
MPs were debating whether to hold a referendum on replacing the electoral first-past-the-post system with that of the alternative vote.
the subject matter "seemed to drive MPs to the brink of metaphor madness. The Tories, in particular, seemed almost high on hyperbole."
, calling certain members of the opposition, including those with memorable expense claims, "bonkers":
"The Tories began to out-bonkers each other. Mr Gummer (moles and jackdaws removed) said the bill was 'redolent of the smell at the heart of this government, and the stench of a prime minister who puts his own future before the country'. Patrick Cormack (nothing much, really) said the Labour party was 'like a rotting mackerel by moonlight - it stinks!'"
on how best to describe the Speaker's style, quoting some of Mr Bercow's comments at Justice Questions:
"'I'm glad to see the House in such a good mood!'
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"And, 'I'm sure the House is grateful for the courtesy of such full ministerial replies but in view of the number of members trying to catch my eye I think we would be better served by the abridged version rather than the full War and Peace.'
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"Charming? Amiable? Game-show compere? You decide."
Elsewhere, Defence Secretary Bob Ainsworth and Lieutenant General, Deputy Chief of Defence Staff Simon Mayall were giving evidence to the defence select committee. the former's choice of phrase in addressing the latter:
"Mr Ainsworth kept referring to him as 'General Simon'. The General-would have surely been within his rights to refer to the minister as 'Secretary Bob' but naturally did nothing of the sort. Smooth, posh manner. Buttery as a crumpet."
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