Taking the right path
Do you, like me, recall a wonderful episode of "Dr Finlay's Casebook" in which the tyro medic is fervently protesting his lack of knowledge regarding some particular ailment?
In response, the gruff, experienced Dr Snoddie leans forward and advises, bluntly: "Well, ye ken noo!"
The role of Dr Snoddie was today capably adapted by the First Minister when he was questioned by Labour's Iain Gray about security advice relating to paths on the royal estate of Balmoral.
The police, apparently, had been keen to play down the fact that there is existing public access to these pathways. Unaccountably, Alex Salmond seemed to feel that this desire had been rather countermanded by huge coverage of the issue in The Record and The Press and Journal.
The FM appeared to think that these hitherto obscure walkways would now be sought out by every Record and P&J reader with a pair of usable boots. Or even sandals.
Assuming his very gravest demeanour, the FM said he had asked the Home Office to instigate a leak inquiry. Perish the thought, but Mr Salmond actually seemed to feel that the leaked information re the royal estate had come from the UK Government.
More visitors
So what's it all about? Apparently, there are two paths through Balmoral open to members of the wandering public. It was proposed to transform them into posh paths by giving them core status within the Cairngorm National Park.
This would have advertised them far more widely, by featuring them in well-publicised maps. That would, presumably, have attracted far more visitors.
Balmoral objected, there was a counter-objection, it went to an inquiry, the reporter said they could only be excluded on security grounds.
It fell to the Environment Minister, Roseanna Cunningham. Ms Cunningham, known for her aversion to monarchy, wrote to the Home Office on the 10th of December seeking "additional information", while noting that she was "minded" at that point to proceed with core status.
A reply was sent by the Home Ofice Minister David Hanson on 11 January to the effect that security would be breached - and that he would veto any move to give the paths core status.
Newspaper stories
According to the FM, this letter was received on 14 January. That same day, Ms Cunningham instructed that the paths be excluded from core status. That was communicated and received by the national park on 18 January.
So what remains? According to Mr Gray, Ms Cunningham didn't need any "additional information".
The Home Office view had been made repeatedly clear to her - that security would be jeopardised. Her attitude had been reprehensible.
The snag for Mr Gray is that, on the day, in the chamber, he was roundly and robustly rebutted by Alex Salmond who was on his most combative form.
Mr Salmond said that Mr Gray appeared to think that Ms Cunningham's decision had only followed approaches by newspapers. That was, the FM said, completely wrong. The Environment Minister had, correctly, followed due process - and the paths had been excluded.
By a combination of rhetoric and relentless attention to procedure, Mr Salmond knocked the complaint aside, leaving his own team cheering and Labour looking glum.
Indeed, during the exchanges, one wag on the SNP side shouted out: "Bring back Jack".
Not everyone had heard this sally. So, ever helpful, Mr Salmond repeated it, while
suggesting wickedly that the said Jack (McConnell) had been witnessed, nodding. Cruel, cruel.
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