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Harvey Belovski, rabbi at Golders Green United Synagogue:

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A rabbinic student once went on a blind date.Ìý Let’s call the couple Josh and Debbie.Ìý Debbie arrived at the agreed café holding a rose, so Rabbi Josh could identify her.Ìý A rather gauche chap with poor dress sense approached her and said awkwardly, ‘Hi, are you Debbie?’Ìý Quick as a flash she replied, ‘Are you Josh?’Ìý He said, ‘Yes!’ to which she said, ‘Then I’m not Debbie!’

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This Saturday afternoon, Jews the world over will read from an ancient wisdom text called ‘Ethics of the Fathers’.Ìý This week’s segment warns against judging people superficially:

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Rebbi says: Do not look at the jug but rather at what is in it.

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Rebbi offers an important life-lesson.Ìý Like Debbie, I believe we all tend to judge people by what we see on the surface.Ìý Josh might have been the man of her dreams, but she never got further than his un-matching jacket and tie to find out.Ìý We often come across this as ‘never judge a book by its cover’, a phrase I remember hearing a lot when I was a kid.Ìý It was good advice then and it is good advice today when social media encourages us to evaluate people and their ideas with only the slightest amount of information.

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I’ve worked in rabbinic recruitment for many years and I know how damaging superficiality can be.Ìý People sometimes decide that they’d never employ a rabbi who dresses a certain way or who affiliates to a particular part of the Jewish world.Ìý But some of the most successful rabbis – the ones who have transformed lives and communities – are often quite different in style, education and background – from whom they thought they’d hire.Ìý But sadly, judging people by their clothes or hairstyle remains common.

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Of course, this happens not just in the rabbinic world but in every walk of life.Ìý It means that some of the best potential employees, lovers and friends get overlooked, and people have ended up in unsuitable positions and relationships just because their face happens to fit.

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Rebbi captures this in the continuation of his statement:

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There are new jugs full of old, and old that do not have even new within them.

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Never judge a book by its cover – you may miss out on a good story, a great relationship or your dream job.