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Caring Work
Shirley Smith began her career as a Nanny over 50 years ago ...
Although nannying has changed beyond recognition since Shirley's early days in the profession, the pain of parting from the children remains the same. For Shirley, parting with Shauna was the saddest. Shauna was only ten days old when Nanny Smith came into her life. Her father and mother divorced when she was three years old and it was Nanny who provided the stability Shauna needed. "I don't remember a time when she wasn't there" Shauna recalls "she was my stability and my rock." Shauna's father, with whom she lived, re-married. Two more baby daughters came into Shirley's care and life was busy with the three girls.
When Shauna was fourteen, everything changed. Shauna recalls "I don't think I really ever thought that my step-mother would decide that she would want to bring up her daughters herself. I don't know who it came as a greater shock to really, Nanny or me." It meant that Shauna's beloved Nanny would have to leave her. Shirley finds it hard to remember the time without emotion "I have to confess that I didn't say goodbye to them... I just left them a note in their beds and went. I don't think Shauna forgave me for a long time, but I thought I would distress her more by saying goodbye than if I just disappeared."
For Shauna and Shirley the parting was like a bereavement. The young Shauna felt alone and confused "If a parent dies, you're angry with them, because you think you've been left." She recognises what agony it was for Shirley "I was cross that she wasn't my mother and that she had a life of her own. She'd rebuilt it painstakingly, with enormous courage. She left us later in her life than she might have done and had to rebuild from scratch. And that was extremely brave. I wasn't very considerate." Time has helped them both come to terms with the parting and Shirley is once again very much part of Shauna's life.
Shirley is now a part-time nanny to the Brockie family. She is godmother to one of the four children and lives close to the family. As Janet Brockie says "I can't imagine life without her. She's a megastar."
Looking back, Shirley says, "I can sit back and think of all the families I've looked after and pretend that they're my extended family. All the possessions people have in the world couldn't make me any happier than I am."
Have you had, or worked as, a nanny?
What was it like?
How did you cope when you had to part?
Tell the Home Truths Team about your family by clicking on the
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