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TOTP Chart Show

Top 5 - Here Comes The Pride

  • Fraser M
  • 9 Jan 07, 12:12 PM

You need a certain kind of self belief to really cut it as a world-beating pop, rock or rap star. The kind of self belief that leads people to deduce that your mirror shades reflect in as well as out. And here's five of the best examples...

No. 5: Justin Timberlake
Justin TimberlakeThere's surely no better example of extreme self-regard in action than the first line of JT's comeback song 'Sexyback', in which he makes the outlandish claim that he is returning the gift of 'sexy' to everyone, presumably because he had borrowed it for a while in order to get frisky with that Camera D'Ass lady.

The only way he could have sounded MORE pleased at that point is if he referred to himself by his own name, as in "Justin's bringing sexy back". But then, seeing as that would also make him seem like some dribbling yokel with no real grasp of the English language, perhaps that would have been a bad thing after all.

No. 4: Lily Allen
Scissor SistersLet's examine what we know about Lily Allen for a second, shall we? She's the daughter of Keith Allen from out of Robin Hood. She was dumped by a man, then she wrote an album about him, then they got back together. Her brother's name is Alfie. Actually, come to think about it, the boyfriend thing might not be right. It's so hard to know for sure, isn't it?

Minor personal details aside, what we know for SURE is a long list of which pop stars, indie stars, actors, magazines, films, songs, and types of yoghurt that Lily does not like. And the reason we have this dossier of dislike is because Lily has been very clear about these things in her blog. Like she's THE QUEEN or something! And if it wasn't such a funny read, and one of the main reasons why she's a brilliant pop star, she'd be consigned to the diva dustbin with Whitney, Tina Turner and the rest.

No. 3: Johnny Borrell - Razorlight
Johnny RazorlightAfter decades of mimsy indie stars with no more backbone than a timid jellyfish and nothing in the way of ambition, Johnny's first pronouncements on how brilliant he is - and by extension how rubbish everyone else is who isn't Johnny 'Johnny' Borrell - were quite refreshing.

And in some ways, his belief in his own talent has clearly brought him a long way, from scuffling indie gigs on pub rooftops to an all-in-white performance at Live8. But bearing in mind the musical sources of his songs are often quite easy to spot, and that his lyrics are in no way profound, or even particularly clever, his faith is sort of based on...er...well, he's quite good looking, I spose, if you like that kind of thing...

No. 2: Kanye West
Kanye WestIsn't it great the way Kanye is like a new sort of rapper who doesn't have to go on and on about when he used to be on the streets waving a gun about and hitting people with a bling-fist until they bleed diamonds out of their nose?

Well yeah, but what DOES he like to talk about, besides not going out with girls who only want him for his child-support payments? He likes to talk about Kanye West, and how brilliant Kanye West is. And when other people don't realise how brilliant Kanye West is (like at the MTV Europe video awards), he gets in a great big huff about it.

Having said that. He gets extra points for dropping the 'professional entertainer' thing to attack George Bush on live US TV. Just because honesty is always best.

No. 1: Bono
BonoJeez, where to start...for thinking that you belong in a PANTHEON of ROCK GREATS, when anyone worth their rocksalt would know that such a thing would be rubbish, would leave out all the really interesting people, and would smell of over-excited music journalists and their fluids...for thinking that the fact that you can sing in tune means you have the answer to all the world's problems even though you don't know how to take your sunglasses off indoors or in the dark...for releasing the same album over and over again, and claiming that it's radically different and brilliant each time...and for being the singer in the biggest rock band in the world, but dressing like an in-between-roles Tom Cruise...ChartBlog salutes you, Mr 'No, but NOT AS MUCH AS YOU DO...

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  1. At 09:22 PM on 10 Jan 2007, Krystal wrote:

    wow awesome

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