Classified Ads - 01/02/07
------------------- VISIT DETROIT ------------------- Come on people, it's the largest city in Michigan! Let me see those... uh, hello? F Le Grand |
------------------- PERSONALS: HEY, BABY... ------------------- I love me. You love me. Let's love me together. Call Mika on 555-8989. |
------------------- WANTED: BLACK PARADE GROUND. ------------------- Successful black parade band need black parade space to rehearse. Must have black changing rooms and black showers. |
------------------- LONELY HEARTS: ------------------- Skinny successful lady with no children or commitments seeks hot guy to mend broken heart. Must be able to tolerate compulsive liars. Contact B Spears. |
------------------- DON'T LOOK AWAY. ------------------- I know it's pitiful to see But I'm still human and I still sing REALLY WELL. Just give me a chance. S Bernstein, er, BROOKstein, sorry. |
------------------- WANTED URGENTLY: ------------------- All your dad's jumpers, cardigans. The baggier the better. Will take home-knits. K. Laxons |
------------------- WANTED: ------------------- More songs about phone calls. I've run out and the second album won't write itself Call PO Box FEELING |
------------------- FOR SALE: ------------------- Collection of Alpine paraphernalia - horns, clogs, yodel-vocoders. Unwise musical venture. Come get it! Gwen. |
------------------- SEEKING PERSONAL STYLIST ------------------- Have had hit single and can buy new jeans now. Maybe Versace! Call The View. |
------------------- DESPERATELY SEEKING: ------------------- Hey, S Club 7? Wanna get back together? I think I'm ready to sing 'Reach' again. Call me! Jo.xxx |
------------------- LOST: PET MONKEY. ------------------- Likes: Vests, hitting things, beer Dislikes: Soap, white socks, not-beer. Answers to 'Mince'. Contact F.Ratelli. |
------------------- FOR SALE: BOOKS ------------------- 'Your guide to retirement', 'Long Walks In The Chilterns', 'Your Prostate And You'. Genuine reason for sale. Call Jay at Hova Towers. |
------------------- WANTED ------------------- Hand lotion for sensitive skin. Shouldn't have listened to my own single while standing next to a brick wall. Send package c/o Akon. |
------------------- WANTED ------------------- Oscar statue. Preferably suitable for giving fake acceptance speeches and whacking that little upstager in the head. Ring The Yonce with info. |
------------------- APOCALYPSE: ------------------- Is it now? I think it's now. Maybe it's next week. See you again next week. My Chemical Romance |
------------------- WANTED: ------------------- Pipe, slippers, comfortable chair, nice cup of tea, biscuits. Foresee end career. R Williams |
Comments
Haha. These are very funny Fraser M!
Lol @ the Feeling.
LOL! My favourite is the one posted by "Yonce" - You JUST know it's true!
Haha, The Akon One Was Ace.
Love The One About The View And The Feeling!!
I Don't Get The Fratellis One Though, But I'm Having A Bit Of A Slow Day So Please Excuse Me.
Yum, More Please!!
It's calling the Fratelli's drummer (Who is called Mince) a monkey.
hee hee!! loving them
hahahaha thats well good! so funny! i love it! good one! xxx
so poor ickle gerard wants black showers. awwwwwww