Ne-Yo - 'Can We Chill'
Ladies, we are in the presence of a very gifted man. He's got a honey-smooth voice, he's got the bittersweet melodies, he's got that clean-cut, box-fresh style thing going on, and he's very considerate to your needs, assuming one of your needs is to find yourself a nice clean-cut R&B star to make sexy with. Oh, and on the evidence of this little ditty, he is possibly the largest manufacturer of solid cheese this side of Cheddar Gorge. How does he find the time?
No, not REAL cheese, of course, audio cheese. Like the kind of cheese you get when your song is produced to sound like a slinky bedroom ballad, only it also seems to contain someone stomping around your romantic boudoir banging on a big bass drum, like they do in marching bands.
(Listen to the song, that bass drum is nuts. Ne-Yo is all "hey, baby, let's unwind on my silk sheets for second here..." and the drum is going "LEFT! RIGHT! LEFT! RIGHT! ABAAAAAHT TUN!". Which must be extraordinarily distracting, if you're attempting to seduce someone the way he is here... )
Or the kind of cheese you get when you're attempting to chat someone up with some really sophisticated one-liners, lots of lingering eye-contact, little smiles, and you've even told the girl that you don't want to waste her time with "corny playa lines". However, what comes out of your mouth is something like:
"Don't let my champagne spill on you"
or
"I can picture you and me being ever so discreet,
Disappearing to the back of this club...imagine that"
or
"baby girl i was just playing, unless you really wanna go"
I tell you, that man is bloody lucky he is good-looking and can sing his pretty songs like Al Green impersonating Michael Jackson, cos his pulling technique is RUBBISH.
Download: Out now
CD Released: September 17th
(Fraser McAlpine)
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